We cannot escape discomfort, but we can choose the kind that
leads to growth, responsibility and ultimately, Krishna.

By Aarushi Agrawal

At a toxic workplace, quitting might be the healthiest option. But we stay on because finding another job is work, because we don’t think better exists, or because we believe that learning how to navigate toxicity is the lesson. But certain behaviours must never be tolerated. Quitting might upend things in the short term but it’s the answer that’ll lead to a better career in the long term. We think we must tolerate toxicity but maybe what we must tolerate is the temporary uncertainty that comes with quitting.

A doting parent might never want to be strict with their child. There are many excuses a parent can make for their child — they’re still just a child, they’ll grow out of it eventually, they’ll learn in time. But sometimes, being strict and becoming the villain in your child’s eyes is the needed thing. The parent might tolerate their child’s increasing brattishness instead of tolerating the temporary rejection from the child when faced with disciplinary action.

In every choice we make, there’s going to be some type of discomfort. That’s the nature of material life. Even in modern society, which is increasingly becoming addicted to escape, discomfort cannot really be escaped. We try to escape our emotions by scrolling on social media but then have to deal with emotional burnout; we try to escape stillness by leaning into hustle culture but then have to deal with exhaustion and uncertainty, tying our worth into our work as we are; we try to escape accountability by going on holier-than-thou takedowns and rants but then we have to deal with the quiet voice nudging us that we were in fact wrong. But life cannot be escaped; the human experience demands a full exploration of every facet of discomfort it brings along with it.

Running from life is not an option, but choosing the right type of discomfort is in our hands. What’s the right choice, then? The Gita can answer.

The mighty warrior Arjuna, moments before the most dreadful war in human history, the Mahabharata, wanted to escape. He wanted to choose the discomfort of living the life of a renunciate in the forest over the discomfort of fighting and killing his teachers, family, and friends. After communicating his confusion to Krishna, the Supreme Lord and Arjuna’s dear friend and charioteer, Krishna responds like this:

klaibyam ma sma gamah partha
naitat tvayy upapadyate
kshudram hridaya-daurbalyam
tyaktvottishtha parantapa

“O son of Prathâ, do not yield to this degrading impotence. It does not become you. Give up such petty weakness of heart and arise, O chastiser of the enemy.”

(Bhagavad-gita 2.3)

The depth of their friendship is evident by the fact that Krishna decides to respond to Arjuna’s anxieties by calling it “degrading impotence.” But there’s a deep lesson here. Arjuna is a kshatriya. It is his duty to fight. This verse is often misinterpreted as proof of the Gita propagating violence. But the context is deeply important. Krishna would not give the same advice to a monk, a businesswoman or a general trader. He’s asking Arjuna to fight because that’s his role in society. It’s akin to a soldier wanting to turn away from a war moments before it begins. Would that soldier’s senior let her simply walk away from the war, or would the more helpful advice, in that context, be motivation to pick up her weapons and fight?

Even though He’s the all-powerful Supreme Lord, He does not remove Arjuna’s conflict. In the material world, there’s no escape from struggle. But He does offer advice about how to navigate this world. What Krishna is essentially telling Arjuna to do is follow his duty, to pick, of the two discomforts, the one that aligns with his dharma and context. In the same way, it’s a person’s duty to stand up for themselves and walk away from toxicity, or at least ask for help. It’s a parent’s duty to be as disciplinary as they are loving. In whatever role we take up in life, there are certain duties that come with it. We must follow through with those, uncomfortable as that might make us — the only way out is through.

But how does one know which discomfort to lean into, which one aligns more correctly with our duty? What even is our duty? In a global, democratic, secular society, there is no one right way of behaving. Everyone has their own ideals, ideas of right and wrong, and ways of perceiving, processing and navigating life. But as devotees, we don’t rely on the limited power of our own minds. We understand that there are far larger powers in the universe, ideas and concepts we can’t even fully comprehend. So we rely on scripture, on our guru and Srila Prabhupada, on those devotees that are willing to offer us their association, because for a devotee, responsibility doesn’t just end at doing material life conscientiously. We have awareness of the larger picture, of Krishna as the goal of life and of our identity as a devotee and servant of Krishna. So we have a spiritual duty too. To do our sadhana, to associate with devotees and to spread the message of Krishna to the best of our abilities.

There will of course be discomfort and challenges. Doing our duty doesn’t mean life will be conflict free. But spirituality elevates the experience of the journey called life. Bhakti is like sugar; it makes everything it’s added to sweeter. Through the context of bhakti, when we bring Krishna into our lives, challenges become opportunities to learn from lessons coming directly from Krishna, discomfort becomes a test Krishna has designed personally for us so we can assess our progress, chanting becomes an opportunity to associate directly with Krishna, sadhana becomes the process by which we fall more deeply in love with Krishna. Even those moments when Krishna is feeling distant bring joy, because it’s His way of making us fall more deeply in love with Him, because distance makes the heart grow fonder, as He explains:

naham tu sakhyo bhajato ’pi jantun
bhajamy amisham anuvritti-vrittaye
yathadhano labdha-dhane vinashte
tac-cintayanyan nibhrito na veda

“But the reason I do not immediately reciprocate the affection of living beings even when they worship Me, O gopîs, is that I want to intensify their loving devotion. They then become like a poor man who has gained some wealth and then lost it, and who thus becomes so anxious about it that he can think of nothing else.”

(Srimad-Bhagavatam, 10.32.20)

Try as we might, there’s no escaping the discomforts and pains of life. Life is not going to be easy; that was never part of the deal. But we can choose to lean into the discomfort that will be ultimately beneficial for us, be it in this life or beyond, spiritually. And this becomes easier for a devotee, because they know that Krishna is always around, even when it seems like He isn’t.

Aarushi is an independent culture journalist with an interest in reading and writing. She has been connected with ISKCON Chowpatty since 2023 and finds deep satisfaction in the association of devotees around her. She’s slowly making sense of Srila Prabhupada’s teachings and learning how to notice Krishna’s presence at the heart of everything and everyone around her.